money can’t buy me love
we lodged our parenting order with the family court a couple of weeks ago.
eilis had done a heap of the ground work, practically written the thing, finished all the research about the different points that we need to cover. mr p and i pretty much just signed off.
the parenting order formalises our informal arrangement, allows me to be a “guardian” of the baby, which, as well as allowing me to say things like “you’re not going out in that dress”, also means i can authorise medical treatment and pick her up from childcare and other practical stuff. it is also symbolic, and adds, i guess, a reinforcement of my actual role, which at the moment is clear to us and everyone who knows us, but open to interpretation by the wider community.
all along we were worried that the section relating to mr.p and the amount of time he will spend with her would be the section that saw our application be rejected. we were worried that it was too vague and flexible.
we got notification today that the section that has caused us grief is the section relating to money. poop. of all the sections that is the one we (all three) have been completely clear on, from the get-go. so clear on this point, that we hadn’t even considered that it would be a problem.
it’s a little disappointing, but at least of all the sections that could have been a problem, this is the section that is the least emotive and difficult. i hope we don’t have to deal with lawyers to resolve this. we’ve tried really hard to stay away from them and up until this point we’ve succeeded.
that sucks that your application got rejected, but it’s good that, as you say, the problem section is one you’re not fussed about.
actually, it sucks that you have to go through these hoops at all, but I suppose one advantage of having it all written, signed and official is that everyone knows exactly where they stand which puts you ahead of a lot of families.
it looks like the sticking point was that the family court can’t rule on financial matters at all so if we take that clause out completely they’ll sign off on it. the woman who is working our case was really helpful. hooray. no lawyers!